Photo shoots pics, and a little rant

This is one of the outfits, not the one used in the magazine which you clearly all know as you have obviously ALL bought Compnay Magazine, March edition! If not, only a couple of weeks left to get it!! (How amazing are the shoes?!?!? I just need to do another weeks work, and I'll be buying them!!)
Obviously a close, up, did I really need to label it?!?!
This is the pic they used in the magazine.


Well everyone,

Firstly a rant: (am now reading it through to see if I make sense, and it's all a rant, can't remember what the second non rant thing was going to be...)

The weather! It tricks us last week with a lovely sunny day that means you can take off your coat and one of the 5 jumpers that you wear, and makes you think that maybe, oh maybe it might be getting warmer, BUT NO! This week it's fucking cold and miserable again! GOOD!

The second is that for the last week or so I have been plagued with a skin rash...the drugs? I think it might be, oh joy! AND I had to spend £21 on prescription charges for the various creams....brilliant! Because I am so loaded with an amazingly highly paid job and I so have money to waste of steroid creams etc etc etc! Bring on April when I get free prescriptions and shall make up on a weekly basis something that is wrong that needs a cream/pill of some sort and rinse the system with my 'I'm special and have cancer so I don't have to pay for these ha ha ha ha' card.

Oh and whilst I'm on a ranting roll, because of one of the rashes the doctor (who is lovely and amazing, and said that if I ever need an appointment I get to jump to the top of the queue, woop woop! And rang me with my blood test results etc just to keep me in the loop....why can't they all be like this?) anyways, so one of the rashes, she thought, might have happened because my platelet count might have crashed. Oh joy! And not beyond the realms of possibility if you remember the hassle I had with them a year ago. So had an appointment made with the nurse for Monday (just gone) morning.

So up I got, at the outrageous time of 9.30 to be there for 10. Sat there waiting for 40 mins, just to be told when I got into the nurses room that I couldn't have the blood test done there because special platelet blood tests have to get to the lab quickly and not sit around in the fridge. So off I go to St. Thomas' hospital where I sit for another 45 mins, just to be butchered by the nurse to get some blood.

I have rather delicate veins, and he got a rather large needle out, I asked if he had any smaller and he looked like me as if I was an alien, and said no, they don't come smaller. BOLLOCKS! So of course he fucked up the first arm, I said again, that they normally use a smaller needle with me, he once again ignored me, and dug into my other arm. And it hurt so the vein jumped to he had to wiggle the needle around to try and find the vein which hurt and made me feel a bit funny. He finally managed to to get enough blood for the tube and off I went feeling very battered, bruised and pissed off!

That afternoon the doctor rang to say sorry about all the palaver of the morning, and that I could have had the blood test done at the surgery as it was a standard cell count test, but as she had specifically said platelet count on my notes, the nurse thought it was a different test so sent me off to the hospital!

AAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh

On the plus point, I discovered Lambeth Palace which is beautiful and want to go back and have another look.

I'm also feeling a bit ranty at the moment (have you noticed? No? I didn't think so, I am being rather subtle about it all!) because all these reactions mean I might have to change my drugs and my grand plan is getting monumentally fucked. Next check up, in a couple of weeks, I'm going to ask about Egypt. If she's happy for me to go, I'm going to go in a year. Getting a job seems to be rather hard here at the moment, and I'd much rather be broke and jobless in the sun!

So my dear bloglets, rant over, I do apologise, well only a little bit!

Oh and is Jade Goody pissing anyone else off?? Fair enough sell your wedding for money for your children, but everything else is over the top. Have some dignity! Yes you have cancer and that sucks, yes you don't have long to live which sucks, hundreds of people have cancer and die daily and they do it with a bit of dignity, rather than flogging every second of it for money! (is ANY going to cancer research??) And apparently she is having her death filmed by news cameras....nice! Maybe I'm over reacting and it's a good thing that her suffering is being recorded on a daily basis and that the whole nation is just waiting for her to die, but after a very close and special family friend died a couple of weeks ago from bone cancer at home in peace with her family amI just being a bit touchy about it?? What are your thoughts??

I am now going to bugger off, be grumpy and watch Top Gear and hope that the idiotic antics of Jeremy 'I'm amazing' Clarkson, James 'I have really bad hair' May, and Richard (I fancy you quite a lot, so have no inverted comma name) Hammond make me giggle a little bit!

Hope all is well with everyone, once again, if any of you need someone to work for you...I'm your girl!

Lots of love, laughter and giggles, which believe it or not I am doing a lot of at the moment, mainly due to my amazingly lovely flat mates,

XXX

My article is out, and recent check up

Exciting news is that my article is out in Company magazine, p78! If you have a couple of quid and walk past a newsagents or supermarket, buy it! It is not as I would write an artice about the Leukaemia, but there is a nice photo!

Had my most recent check up on Wed. My consultant was going to up my chemo dosage up to the normal level(100 mg). It was lowered in Edinburgh (70mg)when my platelet count went mental. My consultant said that as it's a higher dose, would get faster results. But I have been having slight reactions to the chemo recently, so she has put that on hold til my next check up which is in 6 weeks rather than 8. The reaction is prickly skin, so nothing bad or anything, but it's not great that it's happening. If it does progress into anything worse, there are 2 other drugs that I can go on, so not the end of the world. Slightly annoying because it gets in the way of my grand plan and moving to Egypt.

My counts were fine, white, 5.9 and platelets were around 128 I think off the top of my head. Didn't have Leukaemic rate results....prob next time.

Am still jobless and have been rejected by the Cancer Research grad scheme....fuckers! And as I have been told my many a person (my parents and sister!) that it probably wasn't the job for me! Have applied for a job at Leukaemia Research so shall see what happens...

That's about it really. Am debating about going out tonight to find some poor victim as it's Valentines day, blah blah blah, or about buying a chick flick and a tub of ice cream and staying in....we shall see!

Until next time, lots of love, laughter and smiles,
XXX

Living in London and 2 years of cancer.

Well my little bloglets,

I have been outstandingly shit recently at writing this. For that I apologise profusely!
So what's been happening...I have moved to London, been here for nearly a month. Am in a lovely mansion flat in Clapham/Battersea (depends how anal you are being), in between the common and lavender hill. Tis very nice! And am living with 3 others. I didn't know them before, but we get on really well, and one of them is seriously into nutrition etc and is really excited about my juicer, sprouting stuff and dehydrator which is great! I wasn't expecting excitement about all my diet stuff, so had made taking over the kitchen much easier.

I am now looking for a job which is exhausting! I have applied for I can't remember how many office admin/receptionist etc jobs as well as being with 8 recruitment agencies....does anyone want to employ me so I can skip the job application and interview process??? I'm serious value for money! I'll accept £8 per hour, or £18,000 per year!!!!!

I have also applied for an assistant role at Macmillan which I'm really hoping to get. The closing date is this Wed, so hope that I will know something by next week. I'll also be hearing in a couple of weeks from Cancer Research and if they liked me enough on paper to put me through to the next round of their grad scheme. I have crossed fingers, toes, eyes etc that they do, especially as it makes functioning on a daily basis rather interesting!!!!

Health wise, I think all is ok. Get rather tired here in London town, but I guess that is to be expected. I just have to be good about not going mental everyday seeing people and staying up late etc My next check up is on the 11th and I'm really really hoping that the bloody leukemic rate will have dropped, hopefully significantly, but I'll be happy with a little one. Just as long as it changes, and changes for the better. If it goes up, I'll be seriously fucked off!

On an exciting note I am going to be in Company magazine in Feb. It will come out around the 15th, so I order everyone to go and buy a copy! It's cause I'm a cancer kid. The journalist has read the article out to me which she has written after about a 2 hur interview...I talk a lot! It was a bit odd because the article has been written as if it was me writing it, but I didn't, so the phrases etc used aren't me, but it's a good article. Just remember that when you read it! Also you obviously know my story as told by me because you have been reading this! And you WILL all read my book when I eventually finish it....I shall start doing more of it during this joyous job hunt!

I don't know what else to say, no doubt have missed out loads of stuff! Oh, last week it was my two year anniversary. I didn't celebrate it in the same style as last year (got very drunk with my friends) as am t total and have been for nearly 8 months!!!!! But because I didn't feel it was quite as momentous as last year. Also couldn't be arsed to traipse into central London!

I think that's it really. Blog again in 2 weeks after my next check up.

Hope everyone is well and remember, if any one has any job offers, let me know immediately!!!

Lots of love, laughter and smiles,
XXX

A belated Happy Christmas

Dear All,

I realise I have been shit once again about writing my blog. Basically everything is fine, not in official remission yet. Had a check up on the 17th Dec, next one is in Feb. Will do a longer blog very soon, I promise!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas, as I did. (and managed NOT to put on any weight, woop woop!!!) And that 2009 is fantastic for you all.

Until next time (very soon!)

Lots of love, laughter and smiles,

XXX

I've had man flu and survived!

Dear All,

I know it’s been a while since I sat down and spent some real time blogging, I thought that whilst I’m at work with absolutely NOTHING to do, (oh the joys of being a temp!) and clock watching pretty much from the moment I arrive until the moment I leave, it slowly dawned on me that this is a good time to update you all on what’s been going on! It also looks like I have stuff to do!

So ummm, yes. Where to begin? It’s tricky because I could track back to when I left uni and tell you all that’s been going on properly, but lets face it, that’s about 4 months, and although I have bugger all else to do, it could quite possibly take me all day to do that, and I doubt you all want a few thousand words to read!

On that note, I have started to write ‘my story’…have I mentioned this before?? If yes, forgive me, forget I’ve mentioned it and enjoy reading about it as if it’s the first time. If no, good! So yes, my story. I think I need to come up with a better name than that, but that involves far to much brain power at the mo. (Temping seems to eradicate brain cells daily, I think it’s the dire boredom!) I admittedly haven’t written anything for a while, but at my last word count I think I was up to about 8,000 and I hadn’t even finished the first day! I bet everyone’s really excited about reading it!! I don’t know if I’ll try and get it published, or if I’ll just keep it as a therapeutic thing, or as a diary type thing. What do you reckon??? Do you think that people would be interested in the written ramblings of a 23 year old about an interesting little blip in her health? Feel free to let me know!

As mentioned I am temping at the mo…finally!! It took a while before I got any work. I think all the students who were on holiday and college people had stolen all the work going…bastards! It started slowly, a couple of days here and there and have been in the same job since the end of September which I suppose is nice…..but it’s rather boring and the pay isn’t that great. But it’s better than nothing, so I continue to come in and be busy for about 2 hours of the day and try and string everything out for as long as possible. I have come to the conclusion that because I have had such a good work ethic drilled into me, when I’m asked to do something I do it straight away, and don’t muck around. Due to this I’m more efficient that some, and therefore do everything much faster, meaning I spend a lot of the time pretending to be busy. I would obviously ask to do more stuff if I could, but I’m working at the local hospital (ha ha ha!!) and my job it to ring bank staff to cover shifts. Once I’ve rung them all and got their availability and booked them in, there’s nothing for me to do. So I play a lot of solitaire and muck around on line. I did feel a bit bad in the beginning as they are paying me to do nothing for I’d say a day and a half, but I suppose when I am needed I’m here and get things sorted. Also they pay me less than 7 pounds an hour, which makes me even less bothered!! On the plus side, I finish at 4.30 (down side, only half an hour for lunch), they are very chilled about me having days off…I have social stuff booked in, and when I get tired they are happy for me to chill out. I also have an arrangement that I can come in a couple of hours later on Wed morning if I think I need the extra sleep, and they are extremely grateful that I am here, which makes it all ok! I was only meant to be here for 2 days at the end of Sept, and then someone was going to start doing what I do as a full time permanent member of staff, but they pulled out, so I’m still here! I’m leaving on the 21st Nov as I need to get a job lined up and a flat in London for when I make the big, scary but very exciting move in Jan. On that note, anyone know anyone who needs to employ someone in the new year??? Or anyone with a nice room going spare in as central London as possible??? Preferably for about a fiver a week?? No….bugger, cardboard box outside Sloane Square tube it is!

On the job front I have found a job at Macmillan Cancer that I would quite like! It’s PA/Team Assistant in Vauxhall. I reckon I’d be pretty good at that, and the salary isn’t too bad (£23,000) which means that I would have an ok amount to spend on rent/bills and of course nice healthy food! Especially as I’m still not drinking!! (Nearly 5 months, how proud are you of me?!?!!) So need to get that job application in by Tuesday. So I demand that all of you have your fingers and toes crossed with that! (Enjoy doing anything whilst like that!)

I feel that this might be a bit boring for you all, but I shall continue anyways! That’s the joy of sitting here and typing, I can do and say what I want, ha ha HA!

Ok, so weekend before last I went to a weekend arranged by Teenage Cancer Trust (google that if you want to find out more about them. They are truly wonderful! I would do a donations plug, but I shall leave that till later!) I had a great weekend hanging out with other cancer kids, although most of the people in their late teens/early 20s are all better now which is nice, because you can hear their story and not be like, fuck you might die, or need more hard core treatment etc cause they have been through it and come out the other side. It’s also fired me up to get involved even though I’m not completely out of the woods yet and help others who have just been diagnosed etc to get them in a really positive state of mind, and that being diagnosed is not a death sentence and that eating as healthily as possible all helps. This of course is also tied in with my wanting to work for Macmillan….as even as an admin person I reckon I could help, as I don’t want to go back to uni and train as a social worker or support nurse etc. It was also a great weekend cause no one could believe I am still going through treatment as I look so good!! I enjoyed all the compliments!! It also meant that I got to spend the weekend with a girl I met when I went to the launch of the cancer forum in Scotland last year. I can’t remember if I mentioned her? She’s called Hannah and had a tumour in her lung which due to a long story meant that she had to have her whole lung removed!! Anyways, she is great and it was great (how many times can I use that?!?! Really need to widen my vocabulary!) to spend some proper time with her. We are now officially buddies! Although she has bullied me into agreeing to run the Great Northern Run next year, so I’m afraid I shall be harassing you all for money…..again….and Milo is going to run the Athens Marathon possibly next year, or the year after, so you’ll get a double whammy of donations harassment! Bet you’re all REALLY excited about that! On the subject of my half marathon run, I reckon that if Hannah can do it with one lung, I should be fine! I am going to check with my consultant first though…

So what else?? Next check up in December should be fun! Oh, I should probably elaborate on my seriously short post from last time! Yes, the bone marrow was clear of Leukaemia, which was very exciting! I made at least one friend cry…and he’s male, ha ha ha! And there were a few others who got a bit emotional. The main response was WOO YOU’RE BETTER!! …I’m afraid to say that answer to that is not quite. All the counts were good, platelets still behaving themselves at 101. The Leukaemic rate was at 0.17%, basically the same as last time, this bugger has to get down though. Hopefully as the bone marrow is no longer producing the Leukaemic cells, the rate will drop and stay down! When these have stayed the same for 2 years, I’ll be taken off the drugs and see how it goes. They say that many people have to go back on the chemo, but I know I’ll be different and won’t have to. So although I’m really happy it’s all going so well, in 2 years time when I get the ‘all clear’ (it’s in inverted comers as far as the hospital are concerned, I know it will be the ALL CLEAR!) is when I’ll be fucking ecstatic!

One last thing before I go as I’ve written nearly 2,600 words (you can see how I’ve written so much of my book can’t you! Once I start I just can’t stop! It’s a bit like Pringles, but not quite…) I have officially had man flu, and survived!! I have had the seriously nasty cold/virus thing that’s been going around. Not only did it have the usual cold things…sore throat, blocked up nose etc. I also had a quite impressive temperature, and it attacked the right hand side of my face. My gland was so swollen, as was my cheek, it was really attractive, so of course I got sent to the local hospital for a blood test. It’s because they are paranoid about infection. As this is the first major cold I’ve had in ages, I wasn’t worried at all. I’m assuming the results were fine as they didn’t bother to ring and tell me. It really pisses me off. I have to get out of bed, go to the doctor, then go to the hospital and make the effort. Why can’t they take 30 seconds to ring and say, don’t worry, the results are fine…grrrr. Anyways, as it wasn’t real flu and not just a cold, it must have been man flu as man flu is so much worse than a cold! And I survived with very little moaning and ‘woe is me’ blah blah blah. So boys, be warned, I know what it’s like! And survived it easily!

Well I really think I should bugger off, this is close to 2,000 words, and it’s nearly lunch time! It’s helped while away the morning, alongside the odd phone call to sort out the two shifts needed today on one of the wards. Oh, if anyone who reads this is a nurse, or health care assistant, and wants some work on wards with elderly people with mental health problems, please be in touch! The wards are in a little unit by the main hospital in Colchester.

So until next time dear readers, when I shall be free of this job, and hopefully lined up with the next, I shall bugger off, and think of what I’m going to put in my job application personal statement bit this afternoon!

Hope all is well with everyone, and wrap up warm as it’s suddenly pretty fucking cold!

Lots of love, laughter and smiles,

XXX

Very exciting stuff once again!

A seriously quick blog, shall expand on it soon.


Most recent bone marrow resutls.....NO LEUKAEMIA IN IT!!! WOOP WOOP!!

So basically I'm nearly in full blown remission!!

Lots of love, laughter and smiles,

XXX

I forgot...

I also forgot to mention in the last blog that my platlets have gone up to 122, woop woop!!! They are finally begining to behave themselves!!

More news I guess after next check up mid October.

XXX